Survivor

Drama in the dental office. I think I mentioned that "the boss" cut hours. No one has been happy about this. But each week it seems there is more turmoil and strife. I usually try to stay out of these battles but it appears even I am not exempt.

Looking ahead at my schedule today I noticed that on days I was supposed to be working my patients had all been moved into another hygienist's schedule. I asked around and no one offered any explanation. I went to "the boss." The issue was awkwardly resolved.

All of the sudden I felt threatened. I felt like my job was threatened. I did what I always do in time of crisis. I went to my co-workers for words of affirmation. In less direct ways I begged them-

"Tell me you like me!"
"Reassure me my job is not at stake!"

Then all of the sudden it hit me what I was doing. I was trying to form an alliance. I was a contestant on Survivor and I was panicking that I was the next to be voted off. In two weeks we are having a staff meeting to discuss the schedule and I am going to be on vacation.

Miss the tribal council?

That would surely be death for my pathetic part-time position!

I did not have much luck forming an alliance. More panic. Of course, any reality show watchers know what comes next. Cue the anger and bitterness. Sure enough rage and frustration washed over me.

As I was plotting my best course of action to undermine my fellow employees and secure my best interests a thought occurred to me. I remembered what I blogged about just days before. Something about politics, every man looking out for himself, ignoring the best interest of my neighbor.

I suppose I'll let the chips fall as they may. I'll pray that my honest efforts at work and the friendships I have established there will not be forgotten during the shake out. It is so hard to see the way these financial hardships bring out the worst in people, myself included. But really, I'd rather lose my job than show up to work and be hated for the measures I took to keep it.

FAIR WARNING: cheesy anniversary post

The other day I was listening to this song. (The song in the playlist to your right. Turn up your volume because it is pertinent to the post.) Being the hopeless romantic that I am, this is one of my top 10 favorite songs. But as I listened I couldn't help but think of the more practical things I do for Richard to show him I love him. So I rewrote the words.

**Please be fair to me and listen to the song first. If you don't hear the song the words I wrote will just make me look like a terrible writer.

Side note: I mentioned seven years in my last post. That would be seven years since Richard and I started dating. Today we celebrate six years of marriage.

Here it goes: A Realistic Lovesong

If you asked me if I would wash your socks and underwear, the answer would be yes, I'd say forever.

I'll do laundry forever.

If you asked me to be the bread-winner for two years while you finished school I'd say, not forever. But I'd work for two years.

If I could stop time just to talk to you; I'd talk forever. Talk your ear off forever.

If you asked me to endure weeks of your business travel the answer would be yes, but not indefinitely. Not forever.

I'd do anything else for you, forever.

If you asked me to bear and rear your children I would forever. I'll be their mom forever.

If you told me to spend less money, I'd be frugal. I'd eat tuna forever.

If you asked me to bathe and dress the children alone every Sunday morning for years because of your church assignments, I'd do it forever. With minimal grumbling.

If you asked me to be with you and join our lives for eternity, I'd say forever.

Because I will love you forever.

In seven years of knowing Richard I've learned...

This month marks seven years since I met Richard. I did this once for myself and really enjoyed it so I thought as a test of how well I know my guy Richard I did it for him. I'm really going out on a limb here. He is a private person. I really tried not to be a braggy-wife, but there were a couple times I couldn't help myself. Even if no one else reads this, I know his Mom will.

101 Things About Richard

1. Richard is the oldest of four boys and one girl.
2. His first name isn’t Richard. It is Lewis.
3. He is named after his great-grandpa and great-great-grandpa.
4. He will kill me for writing this, but he had the 3rd highest score on the CPA exam in the State of Idaho for the year he tested.
5. He served an LDS mission in Barcelona Venezuela.
6. He is a CPO & a CPA. (Certified Pool Operator & Certified Public Accountant. Slight difference in criteria for certification.)
7. Currently his favorite book is To Kill a Mockingbird.
8. Richard will choose popcorn over dessert any day.
9. Excluding popcorn (many a debate if popcorn qualifies as dessert) his favorite dessert is strawberry shortcake.
10. He does not like dogs.
11. He loves to play basketball.
12. He broke his arm two times in one year.
13. His favorite summer pastime is water-skiing.
14. As for winter he would love to be snow-mobiling. Not too convenient for a profession that is most productive January through April.
15. He is very ambitious.
16. He loves Buffalo wings.
17. His favorite pizza is pepperoni and olive.
18. Saturdays in the fall are devoted to college football.
19. One thing he would love to do more of is golf.
20. In the past three years I think he has read more books than the rest of his life combined.
21. He speaks Spanish.
22. His high school cd collection included Reel Big Fish, The Hippos, Pearl Jam, Weezer, Green Day and Goldfinger.
23. One of his favorite things to do with his boys is watch the three major horse races, Kentucky Derby, Preakness Stakes, and Belmont Stakes.
24. He loves Diamond Rio.
25. Richard didn’t get glasses until he was 24 years old and his optometrist was baffled how he had gone so long without them.
26. As with most men, he loves a good steak and a good hamburger.
27. Richard shares my love of San Diego.
28. He has quite a repertoire of "american proverbs". For example: "Where there's smoke, there's fire" and "Smoke and mirrors."
29. Richard also worked at Roaring Springs for three summers.
30. He has spent the night in the Denver airport.
31. He loves strawberry cereals.
32. He is very frugal except when it comes to dining-out.
33. Recently Richard discovered Guitar Hero and became a big fan.
34. In his family he is famous for either having a stomach ache or needing to go to the bathroom anytime something needed to be done.
35. The only two magazines I’ve ever seen Richard read are Readers Digest and Consumer Reports.
36. He hates cold showers and takes long warm ones.
37. He hates being cold period.
38. He was in a fraternity at ISU. (Beta Alpha Psi is an accounting frat, not exactly the boozer type.)
39. His first job was at a pizza place in Boise called Loco’s.
40. His last job before college graduation was at Idaho Central Credit Union.
41. He has spent significant amounts of time in Lewiston Idaho and Spokane Washington on business.
42. He snacks on tortilla chips with either sliced cheese or fresh salsa.
43. He proposed in a tuxedo with a dozen roses. (That was the peak of his romanticism.)
44. When he was 11 and his little sister was born he bore the mantle of oldest brother well, and did much to help his mom.
45. His drink of choice is strawberry lemonade.
46. He reads instruction manuals and assembly instructions devotedly.
47. He has a love/hate relationship with talk radio.
48. He carries chap stick with him at all times, always in the same pocket.
49. He is very practical.
50. He does not like to ride bikes.
51. He avoids touching food with his hands at all costs, using utensils whenever possible.
52. He is not a procrastinator.
53. He does not like to be rushed in the mornings.
54. He had a paper route in high school and was a little manipulative of his younger brother who assisted him.
55. He was born in Idaho Falls but lived most of his childhood in Boise, with the exception of a few years in Sandy, Utah.
56. He is an Eagle Scout.
57. He is a great story teller.
58. He is a very efficient shopper.
59. He does all the grilling at our house.
60. He has only ever had one speeding ticket.
61. A dream vacation would most likely include attending a professional sporting event.
62. He curls his toes while driving to the rhythm of the dotted lines.
63. He once had to write a letter of apology for throwing large rocks down the side of a mountain while camping as a scout.
64. He likes to drive a truck.
65. When he needs to kill time he plays Tetris on his cell phone.
66. His favorite hymn is “Redeemer of Israel”.
67. He dilligently proof-reads all emails.
68. One time he spent three or four hours in the emergency room choking on a piece of fried chicken. It hasn’t stopped him from eating it.
69. He is convinced our next child is a girl.
70. He would rather eat “to-go”than “dine-in”.
71. This year is his 10 year high school reunion.
72. He is a devoted BSU fan.
73. The two movies he is most likely to sit down and watch if they are on tv: Rudy & Apollo 13.
74. TV Show he can watch over and over: The Cosby Show
75. One of his pet peeves is when his hair grows down over the tops of his ears.
76. He was my patient for my dental hygiene anesthesia boards. That meant two practice injections and two injections for the real deal.
77. Shamelessly bragging again: He graduated from ISU with high honors. (Top 5% of his class.)
78. His least favorite college class was philosophy.
79. He had a tense moment once when he made a questionable call as the umpire of his younger brother’s baseball game because his dad was his brother’s coach
80. He is picky about his pillow and rates hotels according to their pillows.
81. He dreams of living debt-free and creates plans to get there.
82. His teenage crush was Alicia Silverstone.
83. He grew up in a hunting family and is frequently teased about the time he missed a great shot at some elk because his safety was on.
84. He tried band in junior high and played in the percussion section.
85. He coached a youth basketball team for one season.
86. Although he is like his father in many ways, he is not a morning person.
87. He serves as the treasurer for a fundraising organization called Fundsy.
88. His auditing specialty is in the forest products/paper industry.
89. He is a planner.
90. He was Cameron’s primary care-giver the first year of his life while I worked and he went to school.
91. He is a hand-talker, making gestures as he makes points.
92. He is the master of spreadsheets. ( I suppose all business people are.)
93. He also enjoys four-wheeling and snow skiing.
94. His ideal job at church would be a youth Sunday school teacher.
95. He is anxiously awaiting the return of his youngest brother from his mission in six days.
96. He loves lazy Saturday mornings.
97. He is the conscientious parent who worries about the well being of our children.
98. He doesn’t like surprises. He is going to hate this list.
99. Just like me, he would never want to work in sales.
100. He cautiously indulges my need for adventures.
101. He is great and I love him.

Jeff Smith, [fictional] man of integrity

I was finding myself a little bit discouraged yesterday to read on the news about another politician confessing infidelity.

I really don't know where to take this post without it ending cynically. I'm usually the optimist but when it comes to politics these days it seems increasingly difficult to believe there are selfless and moral leaders out there.

Last night Richard and I watched Mr. Smith Goes to Washington. If you haven't seen it I recommend it. It had been recommended to me many times before I finally watched it.

I thought about the goodness in people. Somewhere inside the complicated soul is a belief that what they do and accomplish as a public servant must not conflict with a moral code. Love thy neighbor, for example. Do people still believe that?

In addition, watching the movie made me slightly paranoid about what corrupted and self-interested groups are biasing my opinions.

That is almost too scary of an idea to entertain.

I do believe in hope. So for now I'll hold on to it. Hoping that there are men and women out there working from their conscience and the constitution.

Without a doubt I love my country. A quote from the movie:

"Liberty's too precious a thing to be buried in books... Men should hold it up in front of them every single day of their lives and say: I'm free to think and to speak. My ancestors couldn't, I can, and my children will. "

the backyard

Who needs a sandbox when you have a mound of dirt and sod in a weed-infested flowerbed?

Now I have a new excuse for not doing something about that abandoned flowerbed. Where would the boys play? Now as for the other neglected flowerbeds... I have no excuse.

Oh wait! I'm pregnant. That covers just about everything.

so hip

One of those moments where I am just dying to know what Cameron is thinking about...

There are a few things that drive Eli crazy. When he is wearing pants and tennis shoes is it absoutely necessary that the bottom cuff of his pants covers the shoelaces. If a shoelace pokes out or becomes untied he refuses to move and cries until someone remedies the situation. Just a little Eli quirk.

Another of Eli's vices in the sunshine. If the sun is in his eyes he is paralyzed and you see a situation similar to the one described above. I first discovered this one day as we went for a walk. He was in the stroller and just covered his eyes with his hands until the sun was at his back. This trick doesn't work so well when he is walking though...

So I made him a sunhat but that seemed to cramp his style. The other day at the park after repeated fits about the sun, a friend offered Eli her little boy's sunglasses that he wasn't using. That settled it. By the end of the day Eli had his own pair of sunglasses. And you know how it goes, whatever one child has the other must have too.

cravings

I wouldn't say that my "cravings" during pregnancy are much different than when I am not pregnant except for one thing. I feel totally justified in indulging them. When an average everyday craving comes along during a non-pregnant time I typically just acknowledge it, and then forget about it. But during pregnancy I feel entitled to whatever it is I want and I will go to great lengths to have it.

For this reason, the SnoCone shack down the street is going to make a pretty penny off my business this summer. I told Richard I was just going to start at the beginning of the list of flavors and work my way through. He insisted we wouldn't be getting that many snow cones this summer. (Have you seen those lists?) I compromised and agreed to eliminate any flavor that had banana in its name.

The other thing I have been craving lately is cherries. Conveniently, this weekend was the Cherry Festival in Emmett, a neighboring community. We drove the 40 minutes out there and spent the better part of Saturday. Interestingly though, we found no cherries.

The carnival food was a bonus for the pregnant lady.

A woman nearby laughed as I tried in vain to get all three boys to smile and look at me at the same moment. She must be a mother.

It's not exactly true that we didn't see any cherries. There were a couple options for purchasing cherries but only in wee quantities for a colossal price. A local informed me that in the local newspaper I might find some orchards selling cherries for a fair price, especially if you do the picking yourself.


Now we're talking!

credit for Gordon

I want to dedicate this post to my father-in-law and his great wisdom. I hope he doesn't mind. Since Richard and I have been married I have been introduced to many Gordon-isms that I thought were clever but I didn't really understand. Now, as I have children of my own and they get older and find more ways to make parenting difficult I have come to really appreciate the meaning of his phrases.

Today one in particular really resonated with me. Cameron failed to get the toilet seat up in time and urinated all over the bathroom floor. After I finished my stern lecture Cameron said the famous words

"I didn't mean to."

In true Bird form, without even thinking I responded

"Well mean NOT to!"

I've heard that phrase over and over in mock tones from Richard and his family members but today when I said it I meant it with every desperate fiber of my motherly being.

Do whatever it is you need to to do to prevent that from happening. I understand that it was an accident but that doesn't mean you are without responsibility. You neglected to do what it was you were supposed to do in the first place.

I can already tell that I will be using this reply whenever one of my children dares utter the words

"I didn't mean to."

two small people produce a very small person

When I was in Peru I got really irritated with people who would take what we were giving out (shoes, blankets, clothing) even if it wasn't the right size or they didn't need it. They just took it because it was free. I commented on this to one of my travel companions and she pointed out that we are the same way in the United States. I immediately thought of various dental conferences I have attended where people take the Oral-B plastic bag and fill it with pens, frisbies, and various other freebies with company logos printed on them. I've done this myself, only to either throw those items away or give them to a second-hand store. (Except the pens.)

So I determined I would not be one of those people who are addicted to hand-outs. But in spite of this, and in spite of my chronic rhinitis, and also because it requires a second mortgage to take your family to the movies, I took the boys to the free movie. I also don't like to break rules but if you think getting in to the movie is expensive wait until you hit concessions. So I guiltily smuggled cookies into the theater.
Mom! That flash is too bright!

We had a good time. And I loved me some Moto Moto.

After the movie we went to Carl's Jr. for lunch. Richard and I have long been disgusted with the marketing campaign of Carl's Jr. I feel like my cholesterol goes up just from watching the commerical. But alas, CJ's has a play structure and in the spirit of rainy day summer fun I decided to indulge the boys. It's really too bad that Pita Pit or Costa Vida don't have play structures.

I hate play structures for all the obvious reasons. Germs, bullies, etc. But today I discovered a new reason to dislike them. Eli is small. I've always known this, and selfishly enjoyed it because his clothes fit longer and it is easy to hold and carry him. But today after his repeated efforts to climb up where the other kids his age and Cameron's age were playing he was frustrated and disappointed. He was forced to play in the area meant for the little kids, too small to climb. He was surrounded by toddlers still learning to walk. I received many compliments on his language abilities but I reassured the on-looking mothers of his actual age. For the first time I wished he were bigger and he could reach the steps (or maybe shelves is a better word?) up to the slides and tunnels.
Oh, and one more reason I hate play structures. If your child is anything less than angelic you have to make a fool of yourself when it is time to go home. You can choose between begging, pleading and shouting threats up into the tunnels. Or you can awkwardly climb up into the maze yourself to retrieve him. Both are humiliating.

in a funk

I have to give credit to my [also pregnant] sister for that phrase. It just fits.

Blame it on the pregnancy. Blame it on the lousy weather. Blame it on other disappointing circumstances in my life. It doesn't really matter. The last few days I have experienced some serious mood swings. Is there such a thing as ante-partum depression?

Yesterday I spent the better part of the day lying on the couch. I do have a bad cold if that better justifies my pathetic behavior.

Today I woke up to another rainy day. I didn't notice any lightning in the sky but this afternoon I was struck by a metaphorical bolt that electrified me out of my funk.

My last two patients at work were a married couple in their late 70s. The wife was diagnosed with alzheimers about three years ago, a few months before I cleaned her teeth for the first time. Over six month increments I have watched the disease change her and today was a new low point.

She was anxious and mistrusting. She insisted everything I did was "horrible".

I'm so glad that my mind is clear and rational. (Mostly rational.) I'm resolved to use my functional mind to enjoy the blessings I have.

kids love bubbles

Something about the summer... everything is just better. Even on a cloudy day you can enjoy the warm weather and the green grass. If only I had a nice camera and my kids were wearing preppy clothes, that would just be too perfect.

**clarification

While I was terribly annoyed with my visit the other day it wasn't a reflection on the Dr. My Dr. is wonderful. At my first visit with her she was very attentive. I alternate visits with the Dr. and the nurse practioner, and although this wasn't the case at the last office I went to I am told this is pretty standard.

So I would still love your feedback, great doctor-but lousy staff. Do I stay or go?

the provider

I don't want to be a dr. hopper. Working in a dental office I am aware of how irritating the dr. hoppers are. Skipping from office to office to get the free comprehensive exam or the free teeth whitening and then moving on. That is why I am opposed to such offers but that is an entirely different post.

I left my last Ob-Gyn because I heard some things about his personal life that made me question his character. I had always been happy with him as a professional but morality typically crosses professional and personal lines. So I chose someone new.

Yesterday at the office of my new Ob-Gyn, after depositing my cup in the wall (I was pleased to compare my hydration to that of the much more yellow cup still remaining on the shelf) I went back to my room and waited.

And waited.

And waited. For 40 minutes. My back hurt sitting on the exam table and so I lied down and nearly fell asleep. Finally the nurse practioner came in and we listened to the heartbeat.

Big moment.

But by the time I was in the upright position again she was saying to me "Looks like you've done this before and you don't need anything else from me!" as she hurried out the door.

Approximate time spent waiting: 45 minutes (add 5 minutes in the waiting room)
Approximate time spent with health care providor: 5 minutes would be generous

I called Richard and told him I wanted to switch doctors again. He said no. It's a good thing I have him in my life to keep me from being the person I don't want to be.

we're nutty

A friend of mine told a story on her blog about the odd choices her son made when allowed to eat whatever he wanted. I don't recall what he chose, but it took her by surprise.


The other day I was sitting here at the computer and Cameron came in with a lettuce wedge. Although I'm not sure why, I tried to take it away. He insisted that he wanted it and it finally occurred to me that it was lettuce, not cotton candy. So I let him eat it.
I mentioned in the fall that my mom and I signed up for a Community Sponsored Agriculture co-op. In the fall you pay money that is used to plant. In the spring and summer your money is a credit for you at the farm. My mom and I took our first trip out there last week and I came home with onions, asparagus, carrots and bok choy.


Bok choy.

I had no idea what it was or what to do with it. But today was that day, the day before grocery day where the selection is nil. So I got online and found a recipe for bok choy soup. It was delicious.
What does this mean for my family? Just the idea of my four year old eating a lettuce wedge for a snack and me eating bok choy soup for lunch brings visions of hairy armpits and L.L. Bean. Someone help me.

So just to keep myself grounded I bought frozen chicken nuggets and white bread on my grocery run. I haven't had white bread in a really long time.

Greek Festival: In Honor of little Bro

Every year the Greek Orthodox Church in downtown Boise hosts a festival/fundraiser with delicious food. My little brother Evan is currently serving a mission in Greece and this last week marked one year for him. It seemed fitting to celebrate his One Year Anniversary at the Greek Festival. Richard took the boys to a father & sons campout so I went to the festival with my parents and my sister Lori and her husband Sean. A meal out with adults and no children is always a pleasure. MMMM....GYROS. We thought of you Elder Hall and the delicious food you get to eat and the beautiful cities and ocean you get to view.

We love you!

another YouTube

I don't know if people like it when I post YouTube videos. But this one is short and clever. My favorite kind! Not funny clever, but dramatic clever. I guess it was part of a contest done by the AARP called "u @50".

summer's first SNOW CONES

In desperation last night I pulled out Cameron's piggy bank and asked him if he wanted [to treat the whole family to] a snow cone. He answered in the affirmative, of course, with contagious squeals of delight that sent Eli into fits of excitement.

"Nose cones!"

Toddlers are famous for the way they mix up the consonants in the words they try to pronounce. Or maybe just my toddlers, who knows? Some of our favorites with Cameron were/are "Heh-coppert" and "Ta-mah-wer". But it is part of what makes any attempt at language adorable. That and Eli's high pitched nasally tone. In any case, for some reason he has a hard time with the word "snow" and it comes out "nose".

Richard and I love to tease him. Richard will say

"You want a nose cone?"
"No. A NOSE cone."
"Oh, a nose cone?"
"No! A NOSE cone!"
"Right, a nose cone."
"NO Daddy, a NOSE cone!"
"Oh.... a SNOW cone?"
"Yeah."

Poor kid, he knows the way it should be, but just can't make the word come out right. We play this mean trick with all kinds of words like "Lawn Moy" for lawn mower and "Nules" for noodles. It never gets old for us. We are terrible.
But with snowcone in hand, you can't bring these guys down.

the flu comes around

The stomach flu paid us a visit the last few days. It started on Thursday with Eli, and for an unexplicable reason waited until Monday to strike Cameron and myself yesterday.

I am blessed during pregnancy that despite being frequently nauseated I rarely ever throw up. But this virus was determined to see otherwise.

I spent the majority of the day in bed. Luckily my kids are thrilled with any opportunity to spend extensive amounts of time with our On Call Parent. (The television.) I suppose now their brains have turned to mush.

They were so worn out from their time with the OCP that they both took long naps. Cameron slept for 2 1/2 hours and Eli for 4. It made my day. But Richard wasn't so excited about their long naps when I told him that they wouldn't exactly be ready for bed at 8:00. But he forgave me for letting them oversleep. How can you not forgive someone sitting on the bathroom rug hovering over the porcelain throne?

It wasn't until Richard got home and took the boys outside that I had my own turn in front of the t.v. It was short-lived though because I had to change the channel every time a commercial about food came on. That was exhausting so I went back to bed.

Fortunately today after a priesthood blessing and appeals to Heaven I am doing much better. But just to play it safe I am sticking to the BRAT diet.

Time for another bowl of applesauce. It's a good thing it is delicious homemade applesauce. :)

recession hits home

They cut my hours at work. Since I only work one day a week any cut is significant. They actually cut everyone's hours. 20% across the board.

The other day we received our county assesors estimation of the value of our home. It was worse than we thought. But we had seen it coming and worked through the appropriate stages of grief. Denial, Pain, Anger, Depression, "the upward turn" and Reconstruction.

We are now in the Acceptance & HOPE stage. Richard assures me that this experience will make us better people, and our posterity will be more frugal and financially wise. I think he's right. I appreciate his optimism.

For awhile I didn't directly feel the effects of this recession. Even though I watched people around me struggle it didn't hit home. But now we are starting to make our own sacrifices and I hope that we DO learn from this.

I read an article the other day that talked about how self-reliance isn't just self-serving. I have been able to personally witness examples of families who practice financial wisdom being able to assist families in need.

So even though it isn't death we are dealing with here, it is nice to feel HOPE.