april 29th

Eli: Cam! Look it's snowing!

Cameron: Impossible! In the middle of spring?

Girly girl! Or no?

My daughter loves shoes. I am not sure if I should be excited or nervous. I also painted her toenails for the first time and she loved it.



I would say we've got ourselves a diva, but yesterday the "Seasonal Rabbit" at Grandma Bird's brought Miriam a bunny and the boys footballs. She gave the bunny a sweet hug and then reached for the football.

Spring Game


On Saturday Richard took the boys to the BSU Football Spring Game. Cameron was so excited to go to the Bronco field. Afterwards he told me all about the defense and how the offense didn't look so good. Ever since the game either Cameron or Eli will periodically shout "And that's another Bronco... FIRST DOWN!"
These jerseys were a birthday gift from a grandma who knows her grandsons well. This is their best action shot. (It had to be an action shot, Cameron wouldn't just stand still and let me take a picture.)

I guess by having player jerseys and going to the spring game, we have taken our fan-dom to a new level.

St. Patty's Day Race

Another event pre-Simon was Cameron's St. Patrick's Day race. It was the same race he ran a year ago, with Mark. It's been six months since Mark's stroke but he came to the race and it was a meaningful experience for me, and hopefully for Cameron too.
There were lots of friends there and they all wore stickers in Mark's honor. Richard ran with Cameron and Eric (far right) this year. Unfortunately I missed Cameron coming across the finish line because I was looking for Richard, who apparently was having great conversations with Eric while they ran. Thankfully Grandpa Bird was there to cheer Cameron across the line.

Simon strikes a pose

Richard and I usually go to bed around 10:00pm. The house is dark and quiet. I guess Simon doesn't like it. During the day he is a pretty content baby, but once the lights go out...





I try to put him to bed around 9:30 so he'll be asleep by the time we are ready to sleep. Without fail he wakes up around 10:00 ready to party. So we hang out, the two of us, until about 11:30. He's looking at me now,wide-eyed, as I type. I love babies.

Grammatic apologies

After re-reading my post I wrote yesterday, I realize it is terribly written. Oh well. Perhaps it is a reflection of my fragmented and garbled state of mind. Yeah, in fact, I wrote it that way on purpose...

the first rough day

I already mentioned that I had a goal of waking up and showering before the kids were up in the morning. I have been doing well at this until this morning. Simon is a great sleeper at night, once he falls asleep. But each night the past few days he has stayed up later and later being fussy. So this morning I didn't make an effort to get up. I woke up as the sun came through my window and knew I was in trouble. My other mistake that set me up for failure this morning was neglecting another goal of mine, to have the kitchen clean each night when I go to bed. This proved to be the cause of additional stress.


I asked Richard what time it was and he told me, 7:30. Exactly the time to wake up Cameron for school. As I attempted to do so (he was not cooperative) Eli started crying because he had wet the bed. I changed his clothes but left the sheets to be dealt with later. I continued to "encourage" Cameron to wake up and get dressed while I started breakfast. I made Cameron's lunch all the while he sat on the laundry floor crying about the clothes he wanted to wear. I was beginning to lose patience. A mother's life is a great deal of what I referred to earlier as "encouraging." Nagging is probably the better word. "Wake up, wake up, WAKE UP! Get dressed, get dressed GET DRESSED! Eat your breakfast, eat, EAT!" In thinking about the morning later I've decided that there has to be a better way. Cameron needs to take a little initiative and do those things without my "encouragement." I'll be working on a plan for that...


About this time Miriam woke up, and so I got her breakfast. Then Simon woke up but his breakfast was going to have to wait until Cameron got off to school. More nagging. "Put your jacket on, get your backpack, watch out the window for your ride. Don't make her wait, it's rude to make people wait." Simon is not happy, lots of crying. The ride comes, he's on his way.


I fed Simon first breakfast, I try to feed him small meals to help with the spit-up, knowing that he'll be hungry again shortly. Miriam is done with breakfast, clean her up and change a poopy diaper. Eli is done with breakfast, clean him up and get him ready for preschool. It's only 8:42, I have time to eat breakfast myself!


Let the dog out, feed the dog, take Eli to preschool. Upon returning home, Simon is ready for second breakfast. For the first few minutes, without her brothers there to entertain her, Miriam is attempting to climb all over me. Then she disappears. It's quiet, I'm nervous. I finish feeding Simon, he spits up all over but it's his turn to wait again. Miriam is in the kitchen, eating someone's bowl of tomato and rice soup from last night's dinner. Big red mess. Change her clothes. Back to Simon. Change his diaper, change his clothes. I want a shower. I smell like spit-up and haven't washed my hair since Sunday. What to do with Miriam. I grab the magna-doodle that she loves and keep her in the bathroom with me. Take a shower, when I get out she is poopy again. I start to change her, it's a blow out. Change her clothes again, plus now she has a diaper rash.


Everywhere I go in the house someone or something demands my attention. The diaper garbage can is overflowing, the kitchen is still a mess, Miriam's poopy and soupy clothes need to be washed, Eli's sheets need to be changed. Not to speak of other household messes and tasks. I'm definitely feeling overwhelmed.


A knock at the door. It's the J-Dubs. Sorry J-Dubs, not today. A phone call. It's Richard and he has good news. It brightens my day. Another phone call. It's my mom, and she's going to come get the kids in the afternoon. I think I'm going to make it! Simon is asleep. I look around for Miriam. She is curled up on the floor with her blanket, sucking her thumb. It's only 10:27 and I think she is as exhausted as I am. So I pick her up and we rock in the recliner for awhile. But it's almost time to pick up Eli from preschool and I haven't dried my hair yet.


I love the life I'm living. I really do. On most days diaper rashes and laundry are easy enough to handle. And the pay-offs are great. Cameron had a great report card. Eli sings songs to Simon. Miriam gives kisses. And of course Simon meets the measure of his creation by just existing.


This afternoon I'll put the house together and take a nap. Tonight I'll clean the kitchen before I go to bed and in the morning I'll get up early and shower.

He keeps us laughing

I've hesitated to teach my children the proper names for anatomical parts because at a young age they don't understand that some things shouldn't be shouted in public or shared in casual conversation with strangers. The following story made my withholding the information all worthwhile.


We were all sitting at the dinner table when Eli left in a rush to use the bathroom. From the bathroom he called out to me that the water was too cold. I went to help assist him and upon returning to the dinner table I commented

"Eli must be the only child who washes his hands before he goes to the bathroom."

Apparently he heard me because he shouted back to us all:

"I HAVE to or else my peeing thing will get dirty!"


I thought about explaining to him that it is generally accepted by society that the "peeing thing" is inherently dirty and therefore hands should be washed after going potty, but I couldn't because I was laughing too hard.

back-blog


There are a couple things I never got around to posting about before Simon came along, but I wanted to blog-ument (made up word that I love to use) them.


The first was moving Miriam into her "big girl bed." We wanted the transition to take place before Simon's arrival so they would be separate events in her mind and she wouldn't feel like she was being replaced in the crib.

It didn't go so well at first. In fact, it was heartbreaking. She seemed scared and confused and wouldn't stay in the bed. For the first couple weeks we were moving her from the floor by the bedroom door to her bed after she fell asleep. She occasionally still gets out of her bed at night and lays by the door, but she doesn't cry anymore and there is definite progress. I think she also enjoys the freedom of getting up out of bed in the morning whenever she wakes up. And Richard and I love to see her walk out of her room with her crazy bed-head of hair and greet us in the mornings.
Our saving grace when it came to surviving this ordeal was her blankie and thumb. She can handle anything with her two self-soothing necessities.

He's a [happy] spitter

Because of Simon's reflux the pediatrician recommended I keep him semi-upright after feedings. I usually put him in the bouncer/carseat/swing for a little while after he eats. The carseat specifically warns against placing it on furniture, but after doing a brief risk analysis I decided it was in his best interest. While I was in the shower I felt he would be best kept out of harm's (Miriam's) way on the bed.

After my shower I discovered him like this. I guess keeping him at a 45 degree angle can only help so much. Fortunately he is what the pediatrician calls a happy spitter. Miriam was also a happy spitter; although they frequently regurgitate their meal it doesn't seem to affect their temperment. I know his expression doesn't look happy, but what I mean is that he doesn't vocalize his grievances. Eli was a grumpy spitter (if you know Eli, this comes as no surprise), and I'm glad we aren't dealing with that again.

Then there were four

I don't want to over-dramatize this, but I feel as though today marks the beginning of a new chapter in my life. After taking some paternity leave Richard has returned to work today, leaving me alone to embark on my journey as a stay-at-home mother of four.


On Friday Richard left for a couple hours for a lunch meeting at work. It was a beautiful day so I decided to take the troop to the park. As if the adventure of a first outing with four kids wasn't enough, I brought the dog along. She has been terribly neglected of late and I knew she needed to play as much as the kids. But it was a foolish mistake.


I removed the kids from the van one by one, and then let Misha out. It took about five seconds before someone was bleeding. Fortunately it was Miriam, the least likely to care about mere flesh wounds. But Eli freaked out at the blood and for a moment I was tempted to load everyone back up and return home. But I sent Eli off to the playground, cleaned up Miriam and we had a nice time thereafter.


Ever since I found out I was pregnant I've had anxiety about taking care of four kids. After Miriam was born it took me months to feel like I had things under control. So I've spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to enjoy this time rather than simply feeling like I'm surviving it. The strongest impression that I had was that I needed to wake up before the kids each morning. It completely changes my mood if I am prepared for the day before the children start thrusting their needs upon me. I managed to get off to a good start this morning. One for one.


I know there are mothers-of-four, five, six, and so on, everywhere, handling their responsibilities with grace and organization. But I want to use my blog to document this time with the hopes of offering encouragement to others, but also selfishly looking for encouragement from others.


In the words of the Cat in the Hat,


"Here we go, go, go on an adventure!"