Church lasts three hours and for several years now I have spent the last two hours of the meeting tending to the needs of the children, working in primary for those familiar with the lingo. Along with three other women we were responsible for 60-100 children. It made for a pretty intense, but very rewarding couple of hours each Sunday.
Today I was released from that obligation. I went to the adult meetings for the first time in years. As I sat during the last hour I could hear the boys and girls singing and I felt that I had left my heart in the room across the hall.
Although it was stressful in primary, it was always satisfying to feel needed. People relied on me and the kids looked up to me. (At least in my own mind they did.)
Today I felt like a nobody. Just another body in the building. I longed to sit by a restless child and hear them jibber-jabber about Pokemon. Kids love a captive audience. Then again, so do adults...
In any case, I will miss the children. I will miss their irrelevent comments and their brutal honesty. I will miss their inappropriate moments of putting their hands down their pants that left us adults breathless in laughter.
Eating boogers, climbing under chairs, throwing tantrums.
Giving me hugs, genuine smiles, singing like angels.
12 comments:
Your feelings are testament to the amount of time and love you invested in those children.
It does get better but it usually takes a while; adults are so much more boing than kids....
usually
i will miss seeing your sweet face every sunday too:( and your cute belly!!
Was it hard to sit for 3 hours? That was my biggest adjustment when I left Primary. Thanks for all you did! You definitely left impression upon my daughter. She would mention you quite often.
I had that same experience...feeling useless and like I should be doing something other than sitting on my duff in Gospel Doctrine. It may take a few weeks but eventually you will enjoy other things, and another calling may come your way that will help you feel fulfilled again. Take advantage of the time to sit and drench your spirit with the messages in GD and RS. But if you are like me, there will always be that little tug at your heart when you walk past the primary room or hear them singing. Primary is such a wonderful place to be. :)
I just got called today to be in primary presidency. I am excited to feel needed but will also miss being able to hide when i wanted.
Jo, you were a huge example of love and service. I am so going to miss you and all that I've learned from you. I'll have to give you a call whenever I come back to town and we'll grab all the gals and go for icecream! Thanks for wording things so great on this post. You said in a few words what it took me forever to say. If only I could write like you!!!!
All I can say now is, "Ahhhhhhhhhh!"
Jo- You will be so missed! I was always in awe of your sharing times. You always came up with such creative ideas and did such a great job of keeping the kids' attention with your fun stories. I know that they learned so much from you, not only from the words you spoke, but by watching your actions. I know that I have. We will miss you, but enjoy your time in RS and the opportunity to be fed spiritually there.
Enjoy the short time you have to sit for the 3 hours...soon you'll be walking the hall and hanging out in the mother's lounge with your new bundle of joy!!
We'll miss you in Primary!!
Ah, primary! I had the 4-5 year olds for 2 years... and although I loved them it was kindof a relief to go back to relief society! Not that that lasted long anyway (3 months) and now I'm in YW's who are just kids with a totally different set of problems!! Enjoy the adult scene for awhile!
I felt the same way when I was released. Sitting in Relief Society I felt totally empty. It definitely takes time to adjust to having to be reverent during Sunday School and missing out on Singing time. I still miss Primary, and I'm sure you do even more. Who knows, maybe you'll be in YW next!
Primary is the best, I am chorister right now and I love it. I remember being released as a counselor and thinking that I could never adjust to RS and then was called to teach in RS. I said NO! But a wise Bishop knew it was what I needed and I really enjoyed it. It is another fave calling. Enjoy the break and gear up for whatever is next. YW is fun but it isn't the GREATEST calling in the church like so many think. The GREATEST calling in the church is the one you are serving in at any given time! You'll be fine...and I personally think you are AMAZING. Your blog is my very favorite one to read. THanks for all your great posts! I love them! AND you!
Although some days can be quite hectic with so many little ones, Primary is great. I was also released on Sunday, from my sports calling and I have to say I was not terribly upset with saying goodbye. It was a good learning experience and was good for me at the time (while Bryan was gone) but I am enjoying Primary.
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