introspection

I sense the novelty of my experiences in Peru has worn off. I hate to judge my posts by the response I get, but it's hard not to. Maybe I need to ban the comments again, 0 is just such a heartbreaking number.

So this will be my last, but dearest to my heart, Peru post. I have enjoyed writing my thoughts and I appreciate all who read this and justify me in sharing.

What most affected me this trip was the way I saw my weaknesses raw and exposed. This was in part because of the maturity and caliber of the people around me; but also in part due to circumstances. I realized how much I lack and felt a tremendous desire to be better. Let me share an example.

The group I traveled to Peru with and spent the majority of my time with was the medical group. The group I had originally intended to be with was the dental group and they were more than willing to take me with them to the clinics each day. I was torn because I had bonded with the medical group and I felt like a part of them. But I knew my skills would be better utilized with the dental group who all knew eachother well, and I felt very out of place. The groups were going separate ways and I had to decide who to go with.

I called Richard from my hotel room in a panic the first morning. I am totally incapable of making decisions and I desperately needed his advice. He said this. "Just remember who you are there for. It's not about you, it's about them. Make a choice, make it the right choice and put a smile on your face."

There is amazing power in the Serenity Prayer. God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.

I can't say enough about acceptance. What stuck with me about Richard's advice was that my time there was so short. I couldn't waste it away in anxious turmoil about being here or there, with these people or those. I really needed to stop worrying about what I would miss or how I would feel around strangers. I also learned that I couldn't waste away the days being annoyed with people or irritated with a change of plans. The people around me were my best examples of this and as I observed their flexibility and forgiveness I knew I needed to be more easy going and charitable.

I needed courage. There were moments where I was completely out of my comfort zone but I knew that if I didn't take action, step forward or set aside my inhibitions I would regret it later.

There is something Richard always says that used to drive me crazy. He says "It is what it is." I've always wanted to shout back at him "It isn't what it should be!" But that is the whole point. Even though it isn't what it should be, it is what it is. There are so many things that I desperately want to control or change that are beyond my power. God grant me the wisdom to know the difference.

Being in Peru put me in a situation where I wanted to capitalize on a short opportunity without getting frustrated, hurt or angry. Richard's phrase came into my mind over and over while I was there and it was great practice for me to set aside the problems where I could not intervene and have a good time in spite of them.

What I want most after returning is to carry that same attitude with me. To let go of the injustice in the world and the faults of others that occupy my thoughts far too frequently.
I want to enjoy all life's experiences with the same urgency that I felt in Peru, focusing on the positive always and letting go of the negative immediately.

gratitude

I feel like this post will just state the obvious. But let it be stated. Of course it won't be all inclusive, but I'll do my best. I am grateful for:


- Toilets, flushing toilets and best of all toilets where you can throw your toilet paper in them rather than in a garbage can full of others used toilet paper.

- Paved roads, sidewalks, streets, etc.

- Modern technology.
- Easy access to healthcare for myself and my children, and especially the ability to get freedom from pain almost immediately. (I don't want to get political here, and I know that our healthcare system is broken, but we are lightyears ahead of these people.)

- Disposable diapers and other disposable personal hygiene products. (The women get my drift.)

- Clean water and safe-to-eat produce.

- Sheets and beds with nothing living in them.

- Primary education available to everyone regardless of money and social class, and higher education available to many.
- Last but certainly not least, I am grateful to live in the United States of America. This covers a great many individual things I am thankful for that include good public safety, great scientific knowledge, good welfare, opportunity, many freedoms, government programs that look out for my well-being, city governments that are motivated to keep communities clean and beautiful, and so forth.

your donations

I promised pictures of the children that were the recipients of all the clothing, blankets and shoes that people contributed. I am sad to say I wasn't able to take a picture each time of every gift. The clothing in particular and the larger shoe sizes were distributed by someone else when I was doing something else so I apologize. I also left some blankets with a group who stayed after most of us left because they were going to a hospital and orphanage. So some of the pictures weren't taken by me.

Shoes from Chandra and Abby.

The mock-crocks were sponsored by my mother-in-law Julie, and my sister Adri. Close-toed shoes were a real blessing for these kids in the muddy rainy villages.


I'm not sure who contributed this hat and these purple socks...

This hat was made on a loom by my ambitious mother.

A blanket from Lori.

A blanket from Krista.


Thank you again everyone!

humanity

I am ashamed to admit that I am frequently surprised at the number of kind and amicable people in the world. I'm still not quite sure why I think friendly people are so rare. Maybe it is more related to my lack of noticing them rather than their lack of existance. Perhaps my charitable mood during my travels caused people to open up to me and allowed me to notice and appreciate their goodness.

In any case, I encountered many caring people while I was away. Not just my wonderful American travel companions or the Peruvians we served, but strangers on my flights and the employees of the hotel where we stayed. On my eight hour flight from L.A. to Lima I sat next to an Indian (from India) student of the air force academy on his way with a buddy to Peru for Spring Break. He was polite, friendly and gracious. He humored me by looking at pictures of my boys and flattered me by saying how adorable they are. There was also a motherly woman
next to me on my flight from Lima to Cusco who oogled over pictures of Cameron and Eli and chatted me through some wild turbulence.

I love it when the world feels small. I love it when all it takes to make a connection with someone is having one thing in common. What I already knew was the obvious, that we all have one thing in common. Our humanity. What I learned is that it really does unite us.

One evening Kim and I were wandering the streets of Cusco and came across these dancers. We watched them for awhile and after they finished I asked if I could take their photo. One young man grabbed my camera and pushed us into the picture where the others adorned our heads with their festive hats.


A couple in the market that I made some purchases from. He actually didn't like this picture, and requested that I try again but the second one didn't turn out.

Pepe and Ernesto are employees of Ascend that work with the American groups that come to do humanitarian work. They were so humble and Ernesto worked so hard to make us laugh.


This is Sabino. I bought this painting from him and then in his best English and my best Spanish we talked for 20 minutes. I showed him pictures of my family (what a proud mother I am!) and he told me about his love for art and "motos" and his bad motorcycle accident. I wanted to hug him when we said good-bye.

Teaching the kids the hokey pokey...

They told us to bring things that we could use to interact with kids. I brought this magnadoodle and asked the kids to "escribe tu nombre". They loved it.

service

I spent the first day in the village with the medical team. We set up a clinic that included a triage where we took vitals and a chief complaint, three exam rooms, and a small pharmacy. My role this day consisted mostly of painting the fingernails of the little girls and teaching basic toothbrushing skills.

The next two days I spent with the dental team. These days were much more intense and difficult. With the help of a translator I did exams and then gave the injections to numb their mouth for the dentists. We did only fillings and extractions. It was emotionally and physically hard. The Peruvians were stoic but at any given moment there were children screaming and crying. The line went on and on and we had to eventually turn people away.

This girl was especially nervous, but her mother said her tooth had been hurting for over a year. I had to coax her through the entire procedure and by the end I felt like we had accomplished something major together.

All my life I have been taught that by serving others you learn to love them. Now I can testify that to be an undeniable truth. I do not speak Spanish well, and many of our patients only spoke Ketchua. But the look of gratitude in their eyes endeared them to me forever.

I don't know if I will ever have another opportunity to provide service in another country to people so different from myself. But I believe the principle applies everywhere. My dad always taught me, True happiness comes not from the way others treat us, but from the way we treat others. And when I got there, in that moment when I was thinking entirely about the well-being of these people, one at a time, it felt wonderful.

friendship

In a way this trip reminded me of summer camp. (Or EFY for the Mormon youth.) Combine 14 strangers and have them spend long days, late nights, and early mornings together. It's extreme bonding time. You feel like you have known eachother for years and, in our case, because of extensive bus rides, plane flights, and l.o.n.g. dinners we got to know eachother at hyperspeed compared to co-workers or other friends.

The difference between this trip and summer camp though, is that the bonding was on a higher level. These people are experienced in life, and topics of discussion were more mature and meaningful. I developed a closeness and love for these people that, well, I just did.

They are amazing people. But what I learned is that most people are amazing and this discovery can be made by spending quality time and going through emotional experiences with them. That is not to say that we didn't expose our weaknesses. Considering the illness, fatigue and stress we went through it was inevitable that we see the less than wonderful aspects of our individual pesonalities. But like with family members, these faults were easily forgiven.

I wish I could tell you about them all, one by one. But even if I did, it wouldn't mean to you what it has to me. Which is fine. My life has been enriched by their friendship. And it was yet another lesson to me that friendship can be found in the most unlikely places.

work

Peru is famous for the ancient Incan ruins. Rightly so. No matter how many sites we visted I never ceased to be amazed at the extreme effort that was required to construct the walls and terraces. The tools were primitive but the manpower was not lacking.

Saqsaywaman is known for the sheer enormity of the rocks. Without a doubt they were huge.

Pisaq had endless terraces used for farming. We were told that they reconstructed the terraces each year to rotate the soil.

Machu Picchu deserves it's own post. But anyone who has ever witnessed something breathtaking knows that pictures will never do it justice. Just imagine, an entire city in the middle of the jungle, built on top of a mountain 500 years ago. The most physically challenging part of our trip was climbing to the top of mount Waynu Picchu, which overlooks Machu Picchu. The way up the mountain is a rugged and steep Incan staircase, and by stairs I mean rocks. They have installed rope for help on the way up and down.

The view of Machu Picchu from atop Waynu Picchu.
This is me, feeling thrilled at top of this mountain.

The Inca people may have spent their lives in hard labor, but not much has changed for the current Peruvian people. If you click on this picture you can see how high up the side of the mountain the farms are. To get a general idea of the magnitude of the mountains just use the buildings in the valley as a scale. No small task for the people to climb the mountain each day to work on the farms.

Everywhere they go these women carry the alpaca wool and spin it into the thread they use for clothing. In society as we know it here in the United States and in westernized civilization we take the path of least resistance in most of what we do. Successful ideas and products are designed to make our lives easier. Our bread is sliced, "hand-wash only" articles of clothing are taken to the dry-cleaner, our pizza is delivered and even our pharmacy has a drive-through.

Here is my point: I am grateful that I don't have to break a sweat each day just to survive. The freedom of modern convenience gives me opportunities to spend time playing with my children, preparing a good meal, or reaching out to others. Laziness is not an option for the villagers of Peru and I pray that laziness will never be the reason I don't take advantage of the opportunity of time available to me.